Talk about comedy and the words we use.
Good humor plays an important role in our lives. The levity of something funny tells us that we don’t have to take ourselves too seriously and yet we often do. Great humor taps the better side of who we are. Poor humor taps the worst. The comedian walks a fine line every time they speak because they test the nature of who we are in the situations we’re in. The funny thing is, everybody is a comedian. You have to know them to be able to see beyond what they said if they put out words that could be taken the wrong way. In this light, I’ll talk about the pros and cons of a few comedians.
Some of my favorite comedians or people in general have what I consider to be serious flaws that in some cases are racist, criminal or mean spirited. I only call them my favorites because at some point, they had or have a good side that was funny or that I learned something valuable from. It’s sad when someone is great or talented but has a twisted aspect and is too ignorant to change. Especially, when they’re famous and can influence a large number of people. Take George Carlin for example. Most of what he says is logical and extremely funny until it isn’t like the skit he does about overweight people. He’s making money at the expense of hurting people. It isn’t right and it diminishes the rest of what he does.
On the other hand, there are times when a joke can be made that might sound like it’s racist or biased but all people can tell that it isn’t. Don Rickles, Robin Williams and Jonathan Winters all had a way of making sure that their comedy made everybody laugh and still had great respect for everybody in the joke. Generally speaking, when the laughter isn’t biased, then neither was the joke.
My feeling is that more people need to be aware of the words they use. Too many live in a bubble and just fail to see how words can hurt people. There are words that work and words that don’t. We have the choice to check what we think or say before we go on stage or in any given moment.
If you want to know about shaming or racism or how words can hurt; Google it.
Apart from humor, the words we use can also inspire great accomplishments. Consider the effect of great orators and the challenges they were facing in their time. Whether they wrote the words they used or not, they chose to use them. I am torn when I think of John F. Kennedy. When I read about all that was deviant about him, do I discard him as a positive influence in my life? As much as I’d like to, I can’t. The inaugural words he spoke when he said “ask not what your country can do for you, ask what you can do for your country”, I hope are still standing as a cornerstone in my heart.
There are so many situations like this in my life that if I shut out everyone that’s done something wrong, I wouldn’t know anyone. I am comfortable with this thought because I am no saint. In a cosmic way, I weigh the positives and negatives in my life and think that I’ve been lucky. There are so many people that have greater challenges than I do but being able to feel some pain in my life has only been a privilege. It has help me to see it others. As noble as this kind of talk may sound, I am thinking that my words will never be enough to change the impoverished minds of so many people that refuse to change an attitude.
My answer to this conundrum is to just keep trying and never give up. I’d like to point out the benefits of getting along to anyone, that’s in a moment of temporary insanity, there’s more that could be done with all the power you have or think you have. Don’t be quick to act when you may not win or if a win isn’t all you’d hoped for. Good is always the right choice and good is always felt in the heart.
What are your favorite possessions? Why?
Without question my favorite possessions are the gifts, big and small that my family has given me over the years. Especially, the special ones my kids have made in school that they’ve given me for all the special occasions like birthdays and Christmas. This feeling is also there for all things I have or remember from other family and friends. In quiet times, I am honored and deeply appreciate the thought that someone close to me had at the time of a special occasion. I must say, it’s wonderful to have this opportunity to express these feelings when I know that my family and frriends might read this. It’s amazing that every time it happens, it’s like a whole new awakening in my life that brings the greatest joy I’ve ever known. The smallest thing can still bring the greatest feeling.
What I hope to do in the rest of this article, is cite a few examples of what I’m talking about and try to descibe why they mean so much. I say a few examples because there are so many in my life that are too numerous to mention them all. That doesn’t diminish the feelings I have for each and every one of them. I apologize for any I might miss. I hope that others can feel the same as I do about the gifts they get from all the people close to them. All it takes is something small to have a big effect when it comes from the heart.
To start off, Carl gave me card one time that said, “No one travels through life quite like you” and then he wrote in, “stay stylish and travel the white roads”. I know what he meant because it came from the book, Raising The Bar, written by the Clif Bar people, Kit and Gary Erickson that described uncharted roads in Europe where roads are describe by color and where adventuresome people like Kit and Gary, traveling on their bikes, were willing to discover a new place to go without knowing for sure if it was a safe place to be. The hope for white roads is feeling that somehow we’ll get through it but we’re taking the chance together. They crossed the Alps on a white road and packed their bikes. I was honored.
Steph gave me a picture onetime of herself at somewhere about four or five of herself holding up her index finger to indicate that I was number one in her life. She was very intelligent for her age and I was overwhelmed that she would exsprress herself this way. The rest of the world would never see this but I did and it is a gift that stays with me. Somehow, I think that every parent lives for this feeling.
Kristina gave me a wooden cross, I think from Puerto Rico, that I wear around my neck. Each time I see it as I look in the mirror, I think of her and the faith we’ve shared in simple silly things like the words on a penny, “In God We Trust”. Neither one of us will ever erase the thought because we know what it means between she and I and I am again honored to share this feeling with her.
The beautiful thing I’ve come see is that these feelings I have with each of my kids individually, would likely be understood and recognized by everyone. I wish the world could feel this way.
There are a few posessions I have that my wife and kids would recognize but were things I picked out by myself to symbolize a particular belief or sentiment in spite of a greater controversy the world might impart. I have a statue of Elvis, Pope John Paul and mother Mary on the nightstand next to my bed. The statue of mother Mary is crystal glass. I also have a carved profile of Mary in wood that my father brought back from Honduras after going there to fundraise for the church. To me, Mary represents the most powerful woman in the world because of her understanding of love and the care she has for others.
This is all stuff that maybe has a smaller meaning to anyone but me and might somehow spread some of the feelings I have with those that read this. I suppose the reason for this article or for mentioning these symbols and little things in my life, is that I would like to think that my thoughts behind these symbols and gifts are thoughts that I hope could be applied to everyone, everywhere.
What is the best advice your father ever gave you?
One time when Stephanie was very young, maybe two or three, we were at my mom and dad’s house at Sulphur Springs Avenue and a very memorable moment happened that etched a principle in me that I could only hope to live up to. She was about two or three and we were playing a game of chasing each other around the house, kind of like cat and mouse in the cartoons. It was nightime when it was dark outside. I would hide and she would go looking for me until I would pop out and chase her back to the kitchen where mom and dad were and the lights were on. This one time, I was hiding in their bedroom where it was dark and Steph, very cautiously ventures from the kitchen, to the hallway and stood for a moment in the doorway to the bedroom when I all of sudden made a scary noise and started the chase around the corner and back to the kitchen where grandpa was standing on the other side of the fireplace. He leans down and catches her as she was hightailing it at full speed for him to save her. Just at the moment when she jumps into his arms and knew that she was safe, she immediately looks back with a smirky smile as if to say, you can’t get me, and the chase was over. Right then, in the midst of catching her, dad looks up at me and says quietly, with a slight smile, “don’t forget to always be there for her.”
Ever since then, that image of him saying that, gave me an insight to the way he was and the way I should be. He was always there for me. Every kid deserves to have a safe place to be and every parent should know it.
“For that indeed is what we need,
When once we just forgot,
That kids and pets are perfect
And the rest of us are not.”